Week Four: Winnie’s Castle – Ibadan
What a pleasure it was to end my first orphanage volunteering experience at this wonderful home. My first day I was a little taken aback and somewhat disappointed that they didn’t have as many children as I’d thought. However, by the end of my stay, I actually think it is a good thing. You see here the children were like siblings, the orphanage felt more like a home instead of an ‘orphanage’. It had warmth, there was a sense of freedom and hope. The characters and behaviour of these children was reassuring, I got a sense of relief that no way were these ones going to be limited by their circumstances.
How did I come to this conclusion? Let me take you through the experience. First day there and the staff greeted me with smiles and excitement, as they had been expecting me following several phone conversations to get things approved. I was welcomed and introduced to the children; the manager then went into the office to inform the founder of the orphanage by phone (she was abroad) that I had arrived, and get me the essential forms that I needed to sign. I was left with another member of staff and the children-who immediately took my hands and guided me on a tour of their home. I can’t remember what question it was I asked, all I remember is being surrounded, a child or two on each hand, and little ones by my feet all pulling me along from corner to corner and room to room, “This is my room. That is my bed,” “That’s Taye, that’s Kehinde”, “Aunty see our toys” “Yes this is our library. ..” “Aunty, come see…” When the manager had finished her conversation she said “Let me show you round,” I laughed and replied that it was no longer necessary as the children had just finished doing exactly that. We both laughed, impressed by their hospitality.
We then sat down and I asked them what they enjoyed doing when not at school, many of them said reading, so I was glad that I’d brought story books which I took to them the next day. Asked if they liked art-drawing and painting; immediately three of them including the eldest and two younger ones bounced off the couch, went into their various rooms. When they came back I was shown beautiful sketches and illustrations by the older one and the little ones showed me their extremely creative colouring skills “Aunty look, this is my book, look at my picture” “E-ma take! That’s your colour this one is mine”. They also brought out their crayons, sat on the floor and started colouring. Immediately my heart melted because they seemed genuinely happy and confident. The love and annoyance they had for each other amused me too, one moment they are sharing treats that I brought and playing together, the next they are wrestling or purposely tripping each other over and arguing. It simply reminded me of a home, of family. I even remember being scared somebody was going to get injured that I told them off for being too rough, evidently I wasn’t as intimidating as I thought because one of the toddlers, who was not at all impressed that I’d told off his ‘peeps’ paraded over to me wagging his finger and started telling me off in toddler talk, pouting and shaking his head from side to side…think I ended up apologising to the little man.
With regards to the activities I did with the children in Ibadan, compared to the other orphanages it was rather laid back, intimate, cosy, just very relaxed. We told each other stories, read books, of course messy creative play and watched cartoons whenever NEPA brought light. The children were so entertaining, they made me laugh so much with the things they said and did. They really filled my heart with joy, and made ME feel loved, it’s a miracle that I didn’t come back with them all.
As for the staff, they too related and talked about the children with so much knowledge and passion, they were like proud yet concerned mothers, “He’s very good o, he really tries, he’s teachers told us how well he did on he’s tests…Haha you can cook? Okay, what can you cook?..Indomie (noodles). Oh yes, yes I remember (with a big motherly side smile) he can cook!…This one ehn, please before you go teach him, he has to improve he’s English…”
I loved this place. There was no sob story in terms of the children’s well-being at the orphanage, the focus when speaking to the manager and Ambassador of the orphanage was on practicalities. Things we as donors don’t often think about or simply refuse to give our money towards, for example the financial requirements of running an orphanage:
Staff Salary – If the pay is inconsistent, due to lack of funds or it’s too low that their own families suffer then the children in their care are likely to suffer too. You know the saying ‘A happy mother is a happy child’, like wise a happy carer is likely to help nurture happy children. Let’s be honest, none of us want to work for free, think how much people in the UK pay for just a couple of hours for child care. Now image these people not only looking after the children but also raising them, reassuring them regardless of their background, at times leaving their own children to sleep at the orphanage homes to cater to the needs of others. And we in the comfort of our own homes, family and friends start debating about why we ‘don’t give money to charities because it doesn’t go to the people that need it…it’s the bosses that spend it and buy nice cars’ etc. I know in some cases this is true, but then where does that leave charities such as this one? Where does that leave the charities that are run by people with integrity? Where does that leave the children?
Maintenance Costs- Coming here to Ibadan, I realised it’s not just material support that is needed. These children did not lack much from what I could see. However, I was made to understand that just like you and I, you can’t pay rent with bags of rice, though it is needed. You can’t pay school fees with stationary, though they are needed. You definitely can’t pay carers with just ‘Thank you, you’re doing a great job’ though that is also needed. Finance is essential for maintenance, Nigeria has really bad infrastructure that you pray when you get home there is electricity, otherwise the alternative is to switch on the generator which costs money to buy, to fuel and to maintain. Likewise, the building, the mosquito proofing of the home, taking the children out and so forth, all these things require money, they require your continuous financial contributions. To those of you who have made multiple donations, I can’t thank you enough.
I understand people’s concerns, I have them too hence I personally decided to go and see with my own eyes, make my own observations. It is also why I chose to personally use the money you donated to buy things and take them to the children myself, I was able to ensure that they were given to the children. This is also why I intend to go again in December to certify that they are still being used by and for the children. I know how hard we all work for our money, plus I’m protective of you my friends and my own integrity, above all the children. It is essential I keep my promise to the children from each orphanage I visited, by raising enough money to go back and with more resources and some cheques. I believe in miracles.
